Be Where You Are: An Exercise in Mindfulness

Dear Friends,

I’ve been having trouble figuring out what I wanted the focus of this blog to be. I don’t want it to be just another blog. I really don’t. I want it to be useful and informative. I also want it to be a place where I can write my thoughts like I am talking to a friend. A place where my journey through the tangled chaos of life helps you through yours. A medium for me to say, “hey, I had a crazy idea and it worked,” or “I did A, and I hated it. Next time, I am going to do B before A,”. I want to record my successes and failures by sharing them with you. So, I decided I would just write directly to you, my friends. Every week or so, I will take a break from emails, webinars, articles, and conferences to sit down and write you a letter. I mean who doesn’t like a letter, right?

With that decided, it was time to finally write. But about what? What would be as interesting to write as it is to read. Because here is a little life truth, writers like to write. Almost to the point where we don’t really care if you read it. Almost. A topic has to be interesting to both parties but that is often the hardest part. As I sat waiting for the idea for my first letter to you to arrive, my mind began to wander. Worrying about something I said or worrying about a meeting later in the week. Each time having to refocuse my brain to the task at hand, your letter.

I tell you, I was stumped. A first post felt so critical, so…unforgiving. What if it’s boring or useless? What if I say the wrong thing? What if, what if, what if! Ugh, I was over it! Time to bring in the big guns, mindfulness and oxygen. Lots of deep breathes bringing my thoughts into focus and the concentration to stay in the present and deal with the now. POOF…there it is. Yes, guys, that is exactly what I want to write to you about. I mean there it is staring us all in the face. Stay focused and be in the present.

Be Where You Are: An Excercise in Mindfulness Becca Lory CAS, BCCS Consultant Speaker Author Advocate Life Coach

You see every day starts exactly the same for me. I get up, not willingly, feed my pets, eat breakfast, and head down to my office. I work from home, and though my office is on another floor, I often find it difficult to make the shift to work mind and then make the shift back to home mind. Sometimes I cannot. Sometimes I am so involved in what I am working on that I don’t want to stop. And dinner is late and then I feel bad. Some days, I cannot wake the motivation monster and going down to my office is beyond a struggle and then I feel bad. Either way, life is not always “whistle while you work” here in ye ole home office. The thing that has worked to keep me focused through these uncomfortable times is to write myself a note. Seriously, a note.

My cell phone is filled with electronic post-it notes. I have To Do lists for everything. I have a list for my lists so to speak. A grocery list broken down by store, a to do list for work for today, one for ongoing projects, and one for just ideas. I even have a list of movies I want to watch. Needless to say, I love my lists. I rely on my lists. My lists bring me comfort that my brain won’t lose its way and the high from crossing things off a list is magical. But, what do my notes have to do with you? No, I am not going to sit here and tell you to use notes. I am sure you have heard it before and you are either a list-y or a non-list-y by now. What I want to tell you about is what all of my lists have in common. Every single list I write starts with a self-reminder. My lists begin, “stay focused, stay present, stay you,”.  The same three reminders on every list. I write those reminders because I want to make sure that before I do anything, and I mean anything, that I take my own temperature. That I take a moment to get focused on what is in front of me, to make sure I am in the present and not worrying about past or future what if’s, and to remind myself that I want everything I do to be genuine so to just trust in being myself. Those three simple reminders force my brain to be exactly where I am completely and not off on a thought about a what if. Do you have any idea how much that changes the quality of the work you produce? How much those intentions set an environment for success? I am telling you by reminding myself of those three things no challenge is too overwhelming. Whatever the challenge is, it is not the “hard” thing on a long list anymore. It is just another thing you are doing now. The rest of the list no longer exists. You are doing that one thing, for right then, with all of your energy. Do that multiple times and the list is complete, your boxes are checked and you know you have given your best to every single thing you tackled for the day.

You see my friends, we don’t really have a choice about exactly where we are at any given moment but we do have a choice about what we do with every moment. Since you can’t be in the past or future, there is no sense wasting energy worrying about them. You can only be in the present. Concentrate on the now and while you are there, be the best you possible. As long as you stay focused in the present and remain true to yourself, you will find you rarely miss a thing and the paralysis of the what if’s becomes a distant memory. Quite simply, be the best at being you and being exactly where you are right now.

Autistically yours,
Becca ^-^